My name is Gemma Price, I’m a 36-year-old mum of 2 girls aged 12 and 15 and the founder of women’s boxing club Boxing Pretty.
I started Boxing Pretty on the back of leaving a physically abusive relationship. My story goes like this:
I was introduced to my youngest daughter’s dad through a friend – we met on a blind date – I already had a daughter and my relationship with her dad ended and I’d been on my own for a while – then I met him. He started off so nice, couldn’t do enough for me and my daughter, won me completely over – my dad wasn’t too keen on him. He was head to toe in designer clothes, a proper lad. Things got serious pretty quickly, he suggested I move out of my mum and dads and get a house for us – he was willing to move from Bristol to Cardiff to be with me – I was flattered.
So, I did – he moved his stuff down and things started to take a turn – friends would call to the house and he would make them feel uncomfortable – he took 1 of my friends’ cars to Bristol and it was involved in a crime – he had kidnapped someone using her car – the police informed her. Slowly he started picking my friends off, 1 friend who I had been friends with since the age of 13 he accused of trying it on with him – this was untrue – safe to say my friends stopped calling to the house – they said they couldn’t be around him. I made excuses regarding his behaviour. They knew what he was doing – I just couldn’t see it. He did the same with my parents – slowly his behaviour made them stop coming to the house. My eldest daughter never wanted to be at the house if he was there – then I became pregnant. His behaviour didn’t change – he would question my every move, check my phone, take my bank card and empty my account so I wouldn’t have money to go anywhere. I slowly found myself on my own with no one to turn too. He had isolated me from everyone. I had armed police call to my house and raid it, I had my car stopped on the motorway by armed police – this was the type of man he was – he was dangerous and had no fear of the police.
After my daughter was born he physically beat me – she was 10 days old, I was already hurting. We had gone out to celebrate his birthday in Bristol – he beat me outside of a bar – no one helped, his mum didn’t believe he was capable of it. I remember packing up my daughter from his mum’s house at 4am and driving back to Cardiff with vision in 1 eye, black and blue, crying the whole way – I knew I just needed to get away and get home – I had to face my dad the next day. He was furious that this had happened – I remember clearly saying to my dad – “don’t do anything to him – I need you to take the girls if he ever kills me, I need you here to look after them” at that point my dad told me he couldn’t stand by and watch me live my life like this. He said until I walked away – he couldn’t be in my life. As a daddy’s girl – this hurt more than any beating.
During all of this I held down a full-time job and tried to be the best mum I could – for me leaving was so much more dangerous than staying. He had already threatened to kill us all if I left – not just me, he threatened my children too – 1 being his own daughter.
In December 2012 he had gone to Bristol for Christmas with his mum to my relief, whenever he went I had a glimpse at what a normal life would be like without the constant knot in my stomach or the walking on eggshells feeling I had whenever he was home – New Year’s Eve I had a phone call from a young girl from his phone – she informed me she had just had his baby, they were all celebrating the New Year at his mums – my world fell apart.
I spent the whole day in a state of shock wondering what I had done wrong, what had I done to cause him to cheat? I had always done everything he wanted, washed, cooked, cleaned, took care of everything, visited numerous prisons when he was inside – turns out I had done nothing wrong – this was all his doing.
That day he called and told me I was over-reacting – this doesn’t warrant us breaking up – he had cheated and told me I was over-reacting!! He didn’t call for 2 weeks from then – in that 2 weeks I became the most angry and confrontational person ever and that’s so out of character for me. I just felt years of beatings, emotionally being told “no one will love you”, “you’ll never amount to anything”, “who’s going to want you” – I couldn’t even stand in a queue in a supermarket without wanting to punch anyone who looked at me or my children.
The caretaker of the school I was working in ran a boxing gym – he told me to come along as he could see I really wasn’t myself – he told me in no uncertain terms if I don’t do something about my anger – I’d be looking at a prison sentence. I’d always loved boxing – it was something I’d stay up until the early hours watching with my dad. The first time I put the gloves on and punched a punch bag I was on my own – I remember crying as years of anger and built up frustration as to what I had allowed to happen to me came pouring out – I had found a release. I knew if I felt like that there must be other women who do too. Turns out there are hundreds. Domestic Violence and Violence Against Women, most women don’t speak out about as it’s a shameful thing and the hardest thing to talk about. Hence how and why in 2014 Boxing Pretty started (an all-women’s boxing class) – I wanted women to have a safe place, a place to come to safely take out any anger or frustration they had in a controlled and safe way and a space to talk if needed. Since 2014 I have put on 3 all women’s boxing charity fight nights and raised just under £15,000 for local causes. I was the first women in the country to do this!
Since the beginning Boxing Pretty has grown from strength to strength – from starting with 6 girls up to 30 women and girls now train over 4 classes a week. Not all have been through the same or a similar situation – most come to keep fit, to gain confidence, to feel empowered and to make friends – it’s a social space as well as a place to exercise and get a full body workout.
For me if it helps just 1 woman feel empowered – I know I’ve set out to do what I wanted to do.
For any further information follow the Boxing Pretty Facebook or Instagram pages.
Gemma is an amazing person, instead of letting this horrible situation get her down she’s using it to help others, I might her a few years ago by attending her class , which is a killer sesh might I add lol, amazing lady who has given me good advice to start something similar , well done gem. Xx